Product Reviews

Saving All My Kale for You…

July 17th, 2019 by Karen 10 Comments

Real talk: Does anyone actually sit at a pretty vanity table with a special lighted mirror, and scented candles burning in the background, and music playing, and perfect lighting hitting all the good angles while they apply their lipstick or other lip products for the day? — because my usual scenario involves me using the rearview mirror while sitting in my car as it warms up in my dark garage, and putting on whatever I’ve got in my purse in the 30 seconds I have before leaving to take Connor somewhere, and P.S., apparently, three-year-olds have many, many places to be, which is why I’m basically the family Uber driver now.

Anyway, that’s why I’m grabbing something moisturizing with a wash of color 99% of the time (#drylips #priorities), like a balm, a lip tint or a hydrating lip oil, which brings me to the latest love of my lip life by Wander Beauty…

Shine and moisture FTW

The Lip Retreat Lip Oils drench dry lips with moisturizing fruit oils and fatty acids, and they coat that kisser with a shiny finish that feels slightly sticky (but not obnoxiously so). There are four shades to choose from, each with a different degree of vivid intensity, and my favorites are juicy strawberry pink Spa Day, and clear shiny Oasis. Both of them smell and taste a little like vanilla, which I’m cool with.

wander beauty lip retreat 2 — Oasis (a clear shade) on the left and Spa Day (a strawberry pink) on the right

The angled doe-foot has a pointed tip, so drawing into tight corners with the brighter shades is just as easy to do as it is with the nude colors, and the squishy tube means that I can squeeze every last drop outta the 0.33-oz. $22 tubes.

No parabens, phthalates, synthetic fragrances or mineral oil, and they’re cruelty-free and gluten-free as well.

If you like your tints on the bougie side, a la the Hourglass tinted lip oils or the new NARS lip tints, you’re gonna love these!

I love lip oils…but I do not love kale.

I have no problem eating my veggies, but kale? Eww! I’ve tried all sorts of ways to get myself to like kale over the past few years, but it always tastes like gummy, chewy grass to me, and is therefore my equivalent of low-key punishment. (Give me spinach any old day.)

I don’t mind kale in my beauty products, though, especially when they work as well as the Yes to Carrots & Kale Wipes ($5.99).

yes to carrots makeup wipes — The only kale I don’t mind…

yes to carrots makeup wipes ingredients — What’s inside?!

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Unsung Heroes: Sally Hansen Wax Strips

July 16th, 2019 by Karen 15 Comments

sally hansen wax strip review — Smoother then a baby’s butt.

What’s an unsung makeup hero? For me, it’s an oftentimes underrated makeup morsel, a permanent collection product that scoots under the radar screen of many makeup lovers but regularly rocks my world. The long-running Unsung Heroes series features some of my favorites.

Ways to procrastinate when you’re sitting at your desk:

Pluck your eyebrows
Paint your nails
Fall into a YouTube rabbit hole of ’80s music videos
Wax your mustache with Sally Hansen Wax Strips

I used to use Sally Hansen Wax Strips back when I was a waxing newbie, when the strips came in stiff plastic, and you had to warm them up between your hands to soften the wax…

They weren’t all that great, now that I think about it.

The plastic was uncomfortable, and the wax always left a handful of fuzz, so it wasn’t completely effective, but it was convenient, and I could easily find the kits at the drugstore (, I hadn’t yet discovered the wonder of the Bliss blue wax in a cup).

I figured, a low-key mustache was better than a bushy, full-on hipster mustache. *shrugs*

The wax in this newly revamped version of the kit is 10,000% better.

It comes in flexible paper (which molds to the curves of your body), and it tightly grips even the smallest bits of fur to lift everything off in a single pass.
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Crazy Clips for the Win!

July 16th, 2019 by Karen 10 Comments

Question for ya: Have you arrived at that point in life when you don’t care if the world sees the weird things you do to bend your hair to your will? Although I’m not quite the lady at the supermarket with the giant pink curlers in her hair yet (because she don’t give an eff what people say when she’s buying frozen breakfast burritos!), I’m almost there. I’ve taken to wearing these long hair clips when I’m chillin’ at home, or driving in my car, or taking a walk around the neighborhood. I use ’em on wet hair, along with half a pound of flexible hairspray to smooth and flatten out my roots (which are getting progressively more wiry and untamed with each and every new gray hair) as they air dry. El Hub says I look a little crazy, but I’m like, “Hey, man, you gotta do what you’ve gotta do.”

Trader Joe’s alert!

Speaking of the shameless things we do in the name of beauty, I was waiting in line at TJ’s last week when I noticed the woman in front of me had four bottles of this lotion in her cart — and absolutely nothing else. No food, no Joe-Joe’s cookies, NOTHING. Of course, then I asked her to watch my wagon so I could run to the beauty section and grab a bottle of my own.

They’re only $3.99! For a big 16-oz. bottle! I may or may not have done a victory dance in the middle of aisle. 🙂

trader joes midsummer nights cream — A dreamy cream for $3.99

I have lizard lady skin, but a few pumps of this lotion makes my legs look and feel smooth and moisturized without making my skin feel slick or greasy. Even my heels are happy!

trader joes midsummer nights cream ingredients — It’s cruelty-free, too.

Heads up: Even though the label says it’s unscented, I think it smells a little like a kale, spinach and apple green smoothie…which I don’t mind at all.

This is IT

And that wasn’t the only new thing I tried last weekend. I also took this It Cosmetics foundation for a spin.

it cosmetics color correcting full coverage cream tan — I wear the shade called “Tan,” which is the closest to MAC NC42.

The foundations in the It Cosmetics line are famous for doing a little bit of everything and then some, and their CC+ Color Correcting Full Coverage Cream lives up to that multitasking rep. The It crew packed seven products into one tube — a full-coverage foundation, a physical sunscreen with SPF 50, a brightening color corrector, a hydrating anti-aging serum, a pore-less finish primer, a dark-spot concealer and a moisturizing day cream. Plus, a tiny bit goes a long way.

it cosmetics color correcting full coverage cream tan before after — I applied about half a pump and sheered it out with the It Cosmetics No. 22 Brush, which I dampened with MAC Fix+.

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MAC Unsung Heroes: Chili Lipstick

July 15th, 2019 by Karen 5 Comments

mac chili lipstick — MAC Matte Lipstick in Chili is hot stuff! 🔥

What’s an unsung makeup hero? For me, it’s an oftentimes underrated makeup morsel, a permanent collection product that scoots under the radar screen of many makeup lovers but regularly rocks my world. The long-running Unsung Heroes series features some of my favorites.

So, I was making homemade taco seasoning a few nights ago, and the color of the chili powder reminded me of one of my favorite MAC lipsticks.

Smooth, long-lasting MAC Chili is a warm orange-reddish brown beauty in the MAC Matte Lipstick line. You can wear it all year round (’cause red is timeless like that!), but I think it looks particularly great this time of year with toasty tans.

mac chili lipstick swatch — An NC42, always and forever!

Chili perfectly pairs with summery bronze, copper and gold shadows. A few of my favorite eyeshadows to wear it with are MAC Bronze, Antiqued and Mulch, but Amber Lights looks fab with it, too.

I also like it with the NARS Isolde Duo (Tip: Mix both shades together and buff all over lids, and then do MAC Teddy liner on the waterlines… It’s FIRE.) and NUDESTIX Rustique.

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Get Gorgeous Doughnut Lips with NARS Oil-Infused Lip Tint

July 3rd, 2019 by Karen 7 Comments

When your lips gleam like a glazed Krispy Kreme doughnut, you’re doing it right! 🍩

The new NARS Oil-Infused Lip Tints blaze bright neon in their tubes, but they look almost clear on lips. There’s just a wink of coy color, and thanks to the bevy of fruity moisturizing factors they contain, my dry lip flake situation is currently MIA.

The formula feels like a cross between a gloss and a balm, and these somehow manage to not glide around the outline of my lips, which, as a chronic lip-rubber, I appreciate.

One swipe across my lower lip, and another swipe across my upper lip, and then a quick smack-smack-smack, and my lips have that healthy, shiny sheen normally reserved for teenagers just getting outta bed.

I particularly like how sheer the brights are (the rose is a little too shy on my pigmented lips), and I think their delicateness makes them work well with a wider array of looks than a full-tilt, high-pigment gloss.

INGREDIENTS:
HYDROGENATED POLYISOBUTENE · DIISOSTEARYL MALATE · BUTYROSPERMUM PARKII (SHEA) BUTTER · ETHYLENE/PROPYLENE/STYRENE COPOLYMER · SILICA DIMETHYL SILYLATE · SIMMONDSIA CHINENSIS (JOJOBA) SEED OIL · RUBUSIDAEUS (RASPBERRY) SEED OIL · PUNICA GRANATUM FLOWER EXTRACT · GLYCERIN · TOCOPHEROL · HELIANTHUS ANNUUS (SUNFLOWER) SEED OIL · ROSMARINUS OFFICINALIS (ROSEMARY) LEAF EXTRACT · POLYETHYLENE · MICROCRYSTALLINE WAX/CERA MICROCRISTALLINA/CIRE MICROCRISTALLINE · POLYGLYCERYL-10 PENTAOLEATE · BUTYLENE/ETHYLENE/STYRENE COPOLYMER · FLAVOR (AROMA) · SILICA · GLYCERYL DIISOSTEARATE · TRIISOSTEARIN · TRIMETHYLOLPROPANE TRIETHYLHEXANOATE · TIN OXIDE · ALUMINUM HYDROXIDE · POLYSILICONE-2 · BHT · PHENOXYETHANOL · [+/- (MAY CONTAIN): MICA · TITANIUM DIOXIDE (CI 77891) · IRON OXIDES (CI 77491) · RED 27 (CI 45410) · RED 33 (CI 17200) · RED 28 (CI 45410) · CARMINE (CI 75470)]

They’re $26 each, limited edition, and you can find ’em at Sephora.

nars disco infernal — Disco Infernal (by the way, I’m wearing the NARS Wanted Mini Eyeshadow Palette on my eyes).

What’s bumping in my headphones at the moment?

Sometimes when I get home from the gym I like to sit in my car in the garage for a few minutes and listen to music, because, I dunno…I’m alone, nobody’s asking me any questions, and I can just ~~chair dance in complete and total privacy~~ simmer with my thoughts.

Last night, I was listening to a local hip-hop station (106.1 KMEL, which I’ve been listening to since I was in middle school, OMG!) when this song started playing.

I had a moment, man! For approximately four minutes, my Mazda temporarily transformed into Club Karen, complete with booty shaking and arm waving — the whole kit and caboodle.

Of course, this song played in the middle of a mix, so I had to reverse engineer it to find the artist (Ari Lennox). I found her by Googling a phrase from the song: “break me off gitchy gitchy ya ya.”

Seriously, the Internets are amazing!

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